A short list:
People who say ‘at the end of the day’
Stationary buses that then pull out when you are halfway into overtaking them.
Notices on food products that say it may contain nut traces, or it was made in a factory that uses nuts. (See in 'older posts')
People (especially ‘yoofs’) who say ‘innit’ at the end of every sentence. Example: “I is on da bus, innit”.
Indians and Pakistanis who say ‘isn’t it’ at the end of a sentence when they are not even asking a question. Example: “I’m going to make some popadoms, isn’t it?”
Mothers holding babies, with a cigarette hanging out of their mouths (theirs, not the baby's).
Teenage drivers who sit so low in their cars, only their heads appear over the dashboard.
Teenage drivers with baseball caps and heads the size of a macadamia nut.
Slack-jawed mouth-breathing numpties with drooping bottom lips.
Drivers who overtake you at speed on motorways and then immediately slow down to less than your speed, then when you overtake them, they speed up and do it again.
Motorway drivers who stay in the centre lane when there is no traffic in the nearside lane.
People who say ‘fair play to you, mate’
People serving in shops who haven’t the basic courtesy to look up and say hello when you arrive at their checkout.
Mullets. The fish also.
Most Americans.
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Another cracker is the bleached white skinned yoofs with tattoo's who see the slightest hint of sun to take off their t-shirts to show their scrawny bodies to the world. And this is while out shopping in town spending their benefits.
ReplyDeleteTossas